"Nice switch from microcosm to the macrocosm and a nice idea since that occurs to everyone at some point (which is why it appears in futurama). Sound was ok, but really had no idea where the film was going. Like all of the imagery, but think it would have done better with needles than the running girl (certainly worked for Resident Evil) if you want to concentrate on the science aspect rather than character in the opening."
This comment shows that the transition between the neck to the red blood cells was effective and appealed to our target Market audience. Having said this, I agree that the sound track did not quite read to the audience, as this comment states “they did not know where the narrative was going.” Additionally, we could have rearranged the editing to make the needles first after the girl running however I feel the running order of the narrative is effective as it begins the sequence as ambiguous enticing the audience.
"It's way to chopy. do away with the ball pendulums and stick with a specific focus. I liked the aztec parts. Try useing FXhome for your effects. The blood to planets works but could be aproched diffrently. Try useing a spilled blood consept. Zoom into the blood makeing a clean smooth change to the blood cells and slowly morf the cells to your planets. Do away with the explotion, and use a more syphony based type of music stay away from the techno it's to industrial sounding."
I agree with the comment that the sequence is too choppy; however the Newton’s balls are essential to show the passage of time and change in the earth’s atmosphere within this change of time zoom. This person has a good suggestion of using a spilled blood concept for the transitions between shots making a clear zoom into the blood to than change to the red blood cells that the transform into the planets, in order to enhance precision and make it neater and therefore more effective. If I was to recreate my film again, I would take this into account and change my film in this manner. I agree, I did not like the explosion in our work however we found that this was the best transition shot that could be used to change from blood cells to planets. However, with a different approach such as this, I feel the film could be improved upon.
"It definitely works for me, nice work!if i had to be critical the switch from the blood cells to the solar system could be smoother."
This was a positive response, and shows that it appealed to our target audience, the transitions between the switch from blood cells to solar system was again criticised therefore, if I was to complete or change my film I would make this aspect smoother.
Commments taken from inside school:
"Very nice and intense special effect! Evoke my attention tatally. Nice and strong back ground music but does'nt give enough indication of what would happen next and what is going on. But good stuff overall!"
This comment shows that a peer liked our piece of work, and therefore addressed our target audience as she sates “evoked her attention.” The background music again appears to not express the narrative of the story well and therefore the audience is left confused. Not a good way to leave a film, therefore if created again I would consider changing the aspect of the soundtrack.
This is similar to real media life in the industry, where a member of the same community and film would review a film with positive comments on social networks such as You Tube enticing other members of the public to review the film. This scheme is known as ‘Astroturfing.’
"I thought the transitiong from the blood to the red blood cells was really good and the use of animation was extremely effective. Also the credits and the way the opening was edited in time with the music worked really well."
In comparison to other outside Hurtwood viewers, my peer liked the transition between the blood cells as well as the animation. The titles were also commended, which I felt worked well and connected to the timed moments and sound track well.
Overall, the majoriry of our comments were positive, however I will take on the constructive critiscm and as said if I was to create Nibiru again i would incorporate these into my film in order to imrpove and earn it a 5 star rating.
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